Let’s play a game for a minute.
(I love games – in fact, Dan and I challenge each other to a game of Backgammon each night – he’s been on a winning streak lately, but I have a feeling the tables are about to turn in my favor…) Anyway – let’s pretend that you won a game, and the prize was a house of your choice. You could either move into a house filled with joy or a house filled with sorrow.
Which would you choose?
I would guess that the majority of us would immediately (without a moment’s hesitation) choose the house filled with joy! We would imagine that our new home was peaceful and happy and loving and supportive and exciting and well, joyful. We would probably picture ourselves in this joyful home dancing around, laughing constantly, and just feeling light and free.
We would most likely feel grateful that we had a choice about which house to choose. No one wants to live in a house of sorrow. And boy, were we lucky that we didn’t have to!
Now let’s pretend that your essence – your mind/body/soul – your YOUness was your home. Look around for a moment. Are you living in a joyful home or a home filled with sorrow? When you are in your home, are you focusing on gratitude and love or are you focusing on anger and pain?
What if I told you that you had a choice in which home to choose to live in – just like the game above? What if I told you that you could always choose to make joy your home? What if I told you that living in sorrow and pain and anger was a choice that you were making – it was a home that you probably grew up in, got comfortable in, had a family in, and settled into. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t move into a house filled with joy. That doesn’t mean that you can’t start again right now in this moment.
I know what it’s like to live in a house of sorrow. I know that it’s not a whole lot of fun. Like you, I have had some pretty traumatic life experiences that weighed me down and clouded over my inner joy. I have suffered greatly – just like you have. And moving into a house of joy doesn’t diminish my suffering. It doesn’t mean that I’m completely forgetting about it. I can still visit these places within my soul – the anger and the pain and the hurt and the sorrow. But I don’t have to settle in and stay there.
Think about when you go on a vacation. You’re only there for a little while, but you always know that you are going to go back home after a week or so. You never planned on moving there when your vacation was over. Maybe a better metaphor would be to think about when you go to a therapist and delve into your pain. You would never imagine moving into their office, right? You always knew that you would go home when the session was over. And while you’re there, you dive in and go to those places within that need to heal, but you always leave when the hour is up and come back home.
But if you’re coming home to a house of sorrow, that means that you’ve decided somewhere along the way to bring your pain home with you. To carry it with you wherever you go. To identify with it.
And this is understandable. I have done this most of my life, so I understand what it can feel like to identify with these emotions.
But I also know what it’s like to identify with joy and peace. And this is the house that I choose to live in. This is the house that fills me up and gives me love, sweet love.
And that doesn’t mean that I don’t honor my pain and sorrow. It just means that I don’t live there. They are places that I visit – when I need to deal with emotions or situations or experiences that require something other than joy. But I no longer am willing to get stuck in these emotions or identify with them or keep them with me all of the time.
We all deserve to make joy our home. The place that nurtures us. Fills us up. And loves us.Â
We truly all deserve that.
I hope you’ll move into your joy home, too. I’m in mine now, and it’s such a beautiful home to live in. 🙂
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Yes, yes, yes. You’ve put into words a feeling that’s been budding inside me for quite some time. I grew up in a (figurative and literal) house of sorrow, and I’m ready to move out. Thank you, friend.
I’m so glad you’re ready to leave your house of sorrow! Yay! Happy, joyful living. 🙂
Very beautiful – we can actually get what we wish for and work for! I am lucky to experience it. Thank you Jodi!
You are definitely someone who chooses to live in a house of joy. Thank you for being such a shining example, Vidya! Hugs!
The unwanted house guests who make themselves at home- show these pests the door- great post, Jodi. Sometimes it’s a rut that we have to dig ourselves out from.
Exactly, Gloria! I just love how we can choose to move into a joyful existence. 🙂
Jodi,
I love this post. Many people find themselves in a situation that has caused tremendous pain and suffering, and they feel that suffering is the only choice. It becomes a choice made unknowingly. The reminder that we do have a choice to choose joy over sorrow is a powerful one. Thank you for sharing. 🙂
Hi Victor! So often we forget that we have a choice, but we always do. And I’m so glad you and I are both choosing joy. 🙂
Jodi, this was a timely post for me as I have been contemplating “home” and what it means to me. I have finally embraced the home within and the reality that I actually have a choice as to whether it’s a happy home or a home of sorrow. Like yourself, I’ve carried my sorrows around with me like IOU’s. But now I know that I owe nothing. I don’t need to live in sorrow any longer.
Sending love to you Jodi. You and your e-course are both amazing!
Yay! It’s so true that you don’t owe a single thing. You don’t need to hang onto your sorrow anymore, and I’m so happy that you’re embracing the joy within. Sending love!
So blessed to live in a house of joy . . . Beautiful post, Jodi!
Thanks, Martha! So glad you have chosen to live in a house of joy! 🙂
Lovely, Jodi. We all do have a choice and it is something to think about. I love the way you talked about moving into a new house and would it be a house of sorrow or joy? We can start each day with a new outlook, and joy is so much more fun, so why not? Thanks for a great post.
Thanks, Cathy! It’s really true that each day brings with it a new choice – happiness or pain. And I just love knowing that. 🙂
Hi Jodi,
Great post! Love the fact that it’s all a choice…. it’s so very true!
P.S. My first time here… I like it!
Brendan
Welcome to Soul Speak, Brendan! I’m so happy you’re here! 🙂
Hello Jodi
I love that you make this house a choice. An active thing we can do for ourselves, regardless of past difficulties. Today I am going to choose to live in a house full of Joy!
Thank you
Charlotte
Hi Charlotte! Yay – so glad you’re choosing joy, too! Doesn’t it feel amazing? 🙂
I can’t tell you how much I loved this and how much sense it made in such easy terms to understand and to connect with.
Beautiful post!
Thanks so much for such kind words, Dominee! XO
Another wonderful post Jodi. You put everything so clearly…sadly many people stay stuck in the house of suffering or at least visit it frequently. In fact I used to be one of them. I believed I only grew through suffering…when I woke up to the fact that I didn’t have to accept that, it was such a light bulb moment.
Now I choose to always grow through joy, and strange as it might seem, it feels soooooo much better.
Love Elle
xoxo
Thanks, Elle! 🙂 So many of us grow up thinking that we can only grow through suffering – myself included. And I’m learning to release that because I know that life is love, and love flows and is effortless. Hugs to you!
Hi Jodi,
Oh how I get this! I remind myself everyday that I chose to live in a house of joy.
Thank you x
Hi Toni! I’m glad we’re both choosing joy – it’s a wonderful way to live! 🙂